Anyone who knows me well knows that I hate disappointment. I deplore it. Generally speaking nearly any kind of disappointment, no matter how great or small, for me results in crushing heartbreak. One of the ways I have adapted to this disproportionate emotional reaction is to always have a back up plan.
Back up plans have worked wonders in my life - providing meaningful alternatives to plans and hopes in the event that those endeavors don't pan out. A perfect antidote to the high risk of disappointment, particularly in a balls to the wall existence. And it keeps my life moving forward, always changing and progressing, with many wonderful twists and turns. So what if that job I went for didn't come through for me, there is always an offer equally interesting waiting as Plan B. So what if returning to New York isn't in the cards, L.A. is equally fun and something different. Who cares if this project or that desire doesn't materialize, so long as there is some beautiful secondary option percolating in the wings.
But there is a downside to the business of the back up plan. As I get older I come to terms with the fact that sometimes a back up plan provides an escape, an excuse to move on to Plan B before Plan A disappoints. A cowardly alternative to putting all your eggs in one basket.
And more important than that, there is the issue of the power of putting things out into the universe - visualizing something positive to help make it come true. If you have ever listened to guided meditation tracks or anything goal-oriented in nature, they never say visualize what you want...and also visualize a Plan B in case what you want doesn't work out. Nope. They focus exclusively on visualizing your goal, attaining your goal, achieving what you want, and seeing in your "mind's eye" what you want to see reflected in reality.
So what of the power of positive visualization? Certainly one can't focus on making one's true desires and wishes come true if one is also planning for possible failure and disappointment. These are not mutually compatible actions. The latter will always take away from the former.
While I remain skeptical about my own power to will things to happen, these days I am recognizing the possible benefits to focusing on one outcome at a time and the drawbacks of entertaining back up plans. Though I still believe there are huge benefits to having options and staving off disappointment, when the stakes are right. I also am open to entertaining the possibility that I may contain within me the power to make the things I want most materialize, by harnessing the focus of my balls to the wall attitude and effort.
We will see how that works out for me. To be continued....
Back up plans have worked wonders in my life - providing meaningful alternatives to plans and hopes in the event that those endeavors don't pan out. A perfect antidote to the high risk of disappointment, particularly in a balls to the wall existence. And it keeps my life moving forward, always changing and progressing, with many wonderful twists and turns. So what if that job I went for didn't come through for me, there is always an offer equally interesting waiting as Plan B. So what if returning to New York isn't in the cards, L.A. is equally fun and something different. Who cares if this project or that desire doesn't materialize, so long as there is some beautiful secondary option percolating in the wings.
But there is a downside to the business of the back up plan. As I get older I come to terms with the fact that sometimes a back up plan provides an escape, an excuse to move on to Plan B before Plan A disappoints. A cowardly alternative to putting all your eggs in one basket.
And more important than that, there is the issue of the power of putting things out into the universe - visualizing something positive to help make it come true. If you have ever listened to guided meditation tracks or anything goal-oriented in nature, they never say visualize what you want...and also visualize a Plan B in case what you want doesn't work out. Nope. They focus exclusively on visualizing your goal, attaining your goal, achieving what you want, and seeing in your "mind's eye" what you want to see reflected in reality.
So what of the power of positive visualization? Certainly one can't focus on making one's true desires and wishes come true if one is also planning for possible failure and disappointment. These are not mutually compatible actions. The latter will always take away from the former.
While I remain skeptical about my own power to will things to happen, these days I am recognizing the possible benefits to focusing on one outcome at a time and the drawbacks of entertaining back up plans. Though I still believe there are huge benefits to having options and staving off disappointment, when the stakes are right. I also am open to entertaining the possibility that I may contain within me the power to make the things I want most materialize, by harnessing the focus of my balls to the wall attitude and effort.
We will see how that works out for me. To be continued....
